Inspiration

Last night as I was getting into bed, I suddenly remembered to read my scriptures. This is something I've REALLY been having a hard time remembering, so I reached for Dustin's quad that used to be by the side of my bed. It wasn't there, so I started looking around the room for another set. I opened a box at the foot of my bed that said "Dustin & Maryann--Random" on it (we're still getting unpacked, people). Right on top was my old Book of Mormon, so I grabbed  it and flipped it open.

After I got married, I had decided to "retire" my old set of scriptures and mark up a new set. Sadly, once the craziness of married life and raising two kids set in, I fell woefully behind in my efforts to read the scriptures daily. If I even pick up the book at all, it is just to skim a few verses before I fall asleep. I have definitely noticed the lack of spirit that comes with neglecting scripture reading, and I've tried (and failed) many times to get back in the habit. So last night when I picked up my old set, it was the first time in a long time that I had looked through them.

The first thing I noticed was how incredibly worn and dirty they are. Then I started flipping through the pages and saw all of my old markings and notes bookmarks, and I remembered something.

I used to have a wonderful relationship with the scriptures. The day I started seminary in 9th grade, I was challenged to read the scriptures every night. I took that challenge to heart, and for YEARS I faithfully read every single night. I not only read, I really studied and pondered and let the Spirit guide my life. Every page in my Book of Mormon and almost every page in the D&C is marked up in some way. I probably missed reading less than a dozen days from 9th grade until I got married.

I think the reason I fell out of the habit was because I always read before bed, and after we got married we tried reading scriptures together before bed instead of individually, and then the kids and jobs and stress started, and before long I was just so tired before bed that I forgot to read almost every night. I couldn't ever remember during the day, either, because it had never been my habit to read during the day, so I just never thought of it.

Looking through those well-loved scriptures last night, though, I realized how much I miss having the scriptures as a friend and companion. I need that back in my life. So, I'm going to leave my old scriptures out on the kitchen table, or maybe on the couch, or even my bed. I haven't decided yet, but I am going to put them somewhere I will see them every day and remember how much they used to mean to me. Hopefully this will be the thing that gets me back on track for good.

**P.S. I'm not trying to say that I was an amazingly spiritual person just because my scriptures are marked up. I am just the kind of person who reads with a pen in her hand. I'm sure there are people who don't mark up their scriptures, and get just as much (or more) out of them. Just wanted to clarify that.